Dorkgasm - Film

Mel Brooks Announces HISTORY OF THE WORLD: PART 2 | Film News

MRiedlinger — Wed, 01 Apr 2009 08:29:45 +0000

Hollywood, CA - Twentieth Century Fox announced today that Mel Brooks has signed a deal to make the long-awaited sequel to his 1981 classic History of the World: Part I. Titled simply, History of the World: Part II, press releases indicate that the sequel will cover roughly 800 years, starting with a Viking Funeral, which somehow leads to the accidental discovery of America by Columbus, and spanning to a future world run by invisible robot overlords. The studio also confirmed that Brooks' new script, which he reportedly began writing back in January, will definitely include the promised "Hitler on Ice" segment, and will star Will Farrel. Narrator duties, fulfilled by Orson Welles in the original, will be taken up by Maurice LaMarche, the voice actor best known for playing "Brain the Mouse" and providing the voice of Welles in Tim Burton's 1994 film Ed Wood.
April Fool's from Dorkgasm.com!
On why it took so long to produce the sequel, Brooks has stated, "I really wanted to do this project before the Wayans Brothers got their hands on it and fucked it up, and I needed the cash." Though this has prompted some critics to worry that Brooks is only cashing in on prior success, many fans on message /b/oards across the internet have responded positively. One such fan, identified only as "scroob71" on 5dibo.com, wrote, "I am so excited for this! Now all he has to do is make Spaceballs 2 and I can die happy, even if I am a 37 year old virgin!"
April Fool's from Dorkgasm.com!
At press time, these was still no official word as to whether or not Brooks would be directing the film himself, but the IMDB page for the movie seems to indicate that this will be the case. Sources close to Brooks and Twentieth Century Fox also hinted that there would be an open casting call for many of the roles in the film, a process that would be the basis for a reality television series scheduled to run in the fall. Evidence for this will likely be dug up by The Smoking Gun.com as soon as they are done uncovering the seemingly infinite front companies of Sacha Baron Cohen.
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Finally, Brooks denied rumors that he was set to make a cameo appearance in the forthcoming film World War Z, based on the novel of the same name by his son, Max. Brooks stated, "You're kidding me, right? I may be Jewish, but I'm not that broke!"
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This film will be the first true sequel to any of Brooks' films. His 1968 opus The Producers was remade as a musical with an all-gay cast in 2005, and he spearheaded a failed attempt to launch an animated version of Spaceballs in 2008 that had many children in test audiences stabbing out their own eyes. History of the World: Part II marks Brooks' first directoral effort since 1995's Dracula: Dead and Loving It.
April Fool's from Dorkgasm.com!

Top Ten Films of 2008 | Film News

MRiedlinger — Wed, 31 Dec 2008 22:06:34 +0000

Top Ten Films of 2008
By
Michael C. Riedlinger
Editor-In-Chief

What a crazy year for film, you know? We saw dead careers come back to life with a roar, great actors die before their time, and the living dead were practically impotent when they finally showed up at the end of the year. 2008 is the year that the writers went on strike and genre films changed tact and proved that it was those very writers who could turn a bit of clichéd fare into potential award winning blockbusters. Oh wait, I forgot that my compatriots in the world of film criticism tend to look down their noses at mainstream fare. While I agree that 2008 saw its fair share of crap, there were plenty of main-stream gems to get excited about.

10. Doomsday
Yes, this movie pandered to genres ranging from the Ren Faire set to the Snake Pliskin-loving post-apocalyptic sci-fi fans, but it did so very well. What I went in expecting was a piece of genre trash, but what I got was one of those few modern science fiction films that comments on current events in ways only a sci-fi film can. To top it off, the movie was seven kinds of fun!

9. Wanted
I wanted, desperately, to hate this film for verging from the written material, but I couldn’t. Managing to pull off the reverse Fight Club can be difficult, but Timur Bekmambetov pulled it off. Yes, the book is still better, but this director is one of the few who seems to get how to use a lot of special effects to tell a good story. Mark Millar’s input on the script helped keep enough of the original feel of the book in the film, and that kept a smile on my face.

8. Kung Fu Panda
Everyone got caught up in the Disney-fied fervor surrounding Wall-E, but I certainly didn’t. Kung Fu Panda may not have had the social commentary that the Disney/Pixar folks did, but it also avoided the kitsch factor that comes with that company as well. Jack Black and company gave us a good, old-fashioned “love yourself” kids movie, and man, do kids these days need that! Not since Monster Squad have I looked up to a fat kid this much.

7. Stop Loss
The dirty business of the war won’t go away just by ignoring it, even if everyone does it. Kimberly Peirce delivered a film that didn’t look for an answer, but made us look at the problem. What could have been a preachy-leftist trope on anti-war turned out to be a well-made drama about the pain individuals go through because of war. Like her previous film Boys Don’t Cry, the director refused to pull any punches, and this one aims for the gut without getting overly sentimental.

6. Zack and Miri Make a Porno
Note to Hollywood: Kevin Smith is here to stay. The reason Smith films end up being cult classics is that the main stream tries its damndest to ignore him, but he makes fun and poignant films. He is almost a vulgar, narrative driven Goddard, or a modern Woody Allen, and history will treat him better than contemporary critics have. While this film won’t win any awards, its treatment of modern love and the porn industry should accomplish its goal of touching your heart and making you laugh all at once.

5. Hellboy II: The Golden Army
What I love most about Del Toro is that he is unapologetic when it comes to his fandom. He loves comics, and he makes award winning films. Of course, when he makes a comic-book movie, he doesn’t suddenly become any less visionary a director, and this movie shows that. He manages to bring his own dark imagination to the film while still keeping the tone of the original material true to form. Those who lauded Wall-E for its pro-environmental message should check this one out, and everyone else can experience the wonder and awe Del Toro brings to all of his films.

4. Iron Man
Holy crap! Robert Downey Jr. lives! The best part of this movie was that it managed to trick millions of viewers into sitting through an anti-war piece. With a smart script and solid performers on board, this could still have been a cheap shoot’em-up, but it wasn’t. Favreau brought in writing wunderkind Brian Michael Bendis to advise and the world received as solid a look at Tony Stark as anyone willing to read could get. In fact, more so than the stellar performance from Downey Jr., the writing was what made this movie work. The script managed to develop characters, deliver a message, and still gave us all the action we could want from a summer blockbuster.

3. Funny Games
In a year that didn’t see a single thrilling horror film from the studios, Michael Haneke trumped them all with a remake. I normally hate remakes, especially shot-for-shot ones, but Haneke managed to pull this one off. Expect a cult following to build up around this one, and film students world-round will undoubtedly study the wildly entertaining, and extremely disturbing horror film for years to come. Funny Games is the thinking man’s horror film, but it manages to keep everyone else rooted to their seats as well.

2. Tropic Thunder
Normally, there would be a moment where the audience would ask themselves if it was okay to be laughing at a man in blackface. The thing is, no one stopped laughing long enough to do that until it was too late. Robert Downey Jr. pounded out the kind of performance that makes him an award winner. Add to that a comedic ensemble that managed the kind of synergy we haven’t seen since Mel Brooks and Ivan Reitman dominated the 1980’s, and it is no wonder this movie gets away with all it does. Comedy gold, and it still manages to say something poignant about both Hollywood and Americanism. Tropic Thunder is this generation’s Blazing Saddles.

1. The Dark Knight
While the general public was bewildered by the idea of the gay cowboy playing Jack Nicholson, cinema nuts realized the genius of Christopher Nolan early on. Take a good script and put it in the hands of good actors. That is the best plan for any filmmaker hoping to make a successful film. That’s exactly what Nolan did, and when you ignore that this film is based on a comic book, what you have is an crime drama of awesome scope and power. Heath Ledger’s performance is the stuff of acting legend, and the rest of the cast and crew brought forth their “A” games as well. The city of Chicago struts just as much for the camera as the Joker, and once again, the writing carries it all the way to the bank. History has shown us that a poorly written Batman movie does not make money, and this film did so hand over fist. To ignore a film that dared to defy genre conventions and limitations as this one did is a travesty, but then I’m sure the Academy is good at that by now.

Honorable Mention: Clubless: The Legend of Victor Montango, Prince Caspian, Spiderwick Chronicles, and Quantum of Solace.

Coming up in 2009, we’ll see if the suits have learned their lesson and look to pay the best writers for the best stories, because THAT , ladies and gentlemen, is what put your asses and mine in the seats this year. Get in line for Star Trek now, and I'll see you at the cinema!

Death Walks the Streets | Film News

kenneth.holm — Thu, 14 Aug 2008 05:19:31 +0000

Death... Not Only Walks, But Is Off And Running
By
Kenneth Holm
Senior Staff Writer

As you may have noticed, this is my first article is about two months. After my self-imposed exile from the hallowed halls of Dorkgasm, my first step was to renew my professional contacts. First off the bat was a call to James Zahn, the multi-hyphenate auteur behind the Death Walks the Streets multimedia brand. You may remember from an article by our own Hearstian editor Michael Reidlinger in regards to Zahn's presence at this years Chicago Wizard World. Well, it turns out that big events are in store for one of the most eagerly awaited franchises in film. Yes, sir, big things.

Click image to visit the site

When I talked to Zahn earlier this week, I first had to ask about the Wizard World premiere of his Issue #0 of the Death Walks The Streets comic miniseries. While he humbly says that it went pretty well, a quick look online would quickly prove that to be an understatement. From such mainstay sites as Ain't It Cool News, to smaller sites like horrormovies.ca, all have been raving about not only the art, but the writing as well. One fact that a lot of people have been talking about is that something from Death Walks... is finally being released to the public. You may remember that the Death Walks the Streets saga has been going on for many years. We at Dorkgasm have been covering some it for a time now, and it thrills us to see this project beginning to come to fruition.

While addressing the success of the comic, Zahn went on to talk a little bit about the future. Issue #1 should be coming soon, as art is being completed. As of right now, the only way to grab your copy of the debut issue is through the Official Death Walks The Streets MerchDirect website, so I suggest you make your way over there as soon as inhumanly possible. This may be the only place to get it now, but there's a little rumor stirring that the Death Walks... comic may soon be finding its way to Diamond Previews, so Deathwalkers around the country will be able to walk to their nearest purveyor of comic paraphernalia and grab one for themselves. While that may be a little time off into the future, there is no time like the present to support Zahn and his creation.

So, while everyone is happy with the success of the comic, where does this leave the movie? While this is the aspect of the project that most of the fans are familiar with, it is also the one that the least is known about. Being a person of privilege, I have actually read one of the screenplays, but it makes little difference now. Zahn and his co-writing partner Ben Brezinski (who also co-wrote the comic) are currently in the process of revamping (oh God, I made a horrible pun...) the first screenplay in order to incorporate the way certain events are unfolding in the comics. While rewriting a screenplay is business as usual for the film scene, rewriting it to encompass a comic book prequel that was based on the original screenplay is an altogether new and exciting venture. It just keeps getting better, though. If you were to take a stroll on over to the Official Death Walks The Streets Website, you can see the first installment of the New Marshall Stories, a series of video blogs, diaries, and other surprises based on, and even in, the world of Death Walks....

Efisia Fele as Danielle
So, as you can plainly see, Zahn's creative masterpiece is beginning to unfold at a rapid pace, and it would appear that the sky is truly the limit for the duo of Zahn and Brezinski. We at Dorkgasm will continue to bring you all the news from New Marshall as it develops. For now, though, have a look at some artwork from the comic provided to us by the man himself. Special thanks to James Zahn for giving us some interesting tidbits, including some things we cannot even talk about at this point. Rest assured, though, 2008 is the year that Death... truly begins to live.

Clive Barker needs your help!!!!!! --FILM NEWS--

angelknight32 — Wed, 25 Jun 2008 01:47:25 +0000

Clive Barker needs your help if you are a fan of horror films. Mr. Barker has an adaptation of one of his short stories in "The Books of Blood" entitled "Midnight Meat Train"; starring Vinnie Jones and directed by Ryuhei Kitamura. This is to be Kitamura's first american release and the reactions of fans at early screenings of the film seem to really enjoy the film despite the fact that it is a horror movie. It seems that even Mr. Barker is pleased with artisitic interpretation of his story. Now if you have been folllowing the development of the film you may already know that the film was supposed to open a couple of different times over the past year and now it looks as though the film will only be released on a small number of theatres and then go directly to DVD. Now Mr. Barker is asking us the fans for help. If you are a fan of artistic horror films based on stories from one of horrors' premier writers than I encourage you to take the opportunity to write in courteous, professional matter please to some of the people listed below for the distributor of the film Lionsgate, if you wanted an opportunity to make a difference in Hollywood this the first step to take so please write these individuals and let them know that this film deserves a nationwide release and not a limited one....... Thanks for taking the time to endeavor for something better in the cinema.

Joe Drake at Lionsgate: jdrake@lionsgate.com
Investor relations at Lionsgate: keasterling@lionsgate.com

Lionsgate: general-inquiries@lionsgate.com

Call the main office at (310) 449-9200 and express your desire to see MIDNIGHT MEAT TRAIN get the release it deserves.

Please be courteous in your requests...

Where will I be tonight?

MRiedlinger — Sat, 31 May 2008 22:17:32 +0000

Covering the premiere of Clubless at Gurnee Cinema in Gurnee, Illinois! Show starts at 11pm, and it may be the only theatrical film I enjoy this weekend... See you at the movies!

Yes!!!!!!! More Dragon Ball Nonsense!!!

AnonymousJones — Fri, 23 May 2008 17:24:39 +0000

So, I brought you a picture of Justin Chatwin a little while ago in the guise of Goku from the Dragon Ball Z movie. It would seem that a lot of people thought it looked kinda... you know... Fucking stupid. Well, I have more cast pics available now, and I think we will all be able to agree that this does not inspire any confidence whatsoever. So, without any further ado, I bring to you... Joon Park as "Yamcha" Emmy Rossum as "Bulma" Jamie Chung as "ChiChi" Chow Yun-Fat as "Master Roshi" Justin Chatwin as "Goku" and Justin Chatwin, still looking stupid as "Goku" There you have the newest pics released legally of the cast as their counterparts in the DBZ world. This makes me more than doubtful, it kind of infuriates me justa tad. This is one of those properties dorks have been wetting themselves in anticipation over, and it looks like the producers and director are going to absurd lengths to piss people off. Now, maybe I'm just being somewhat of an old crank, but this looks NOTHING LIKE THE MANGA OR ANIME SERIES!!!!! I am sick and tired of people taking established properties and pissing all over them (Transformers, **cough cough**). Oh, well. I th long run, it really doesn't mean a fart in the wind what I think about it. I am only one man. However, if everyone pulls together, maybe we can send a message to Hollywood by not seeing this movie. Sure, and while I'm dreaming, I'd also like a pony... I will leave you with the lamest one of all for your enjoyment...

Welcome the next generation Horror film!!!!!!!

angelknight32 — Tue, 13 May 2008 02:01:56 +0000

I received an e-mail from the fine people who organize horrorfest every year and I learned something very interesting. It seems that there was one film from the 2007 Afterdark Horrorfest that was left out because the content of said movie was too horrific for mainstream theathers, they basically refused to show it. Well the good news is that the film entitled "Frontier(s)" is realeased on dvd the 13th of May and if your as intrigued as I was about what exactly made this little piece of french cinema to shocking for us hardcore Americans then by all means go to http://www.frontiersunrated.com/ to check out the trailer for the film. I simply ask you to check it out, although be prepared to say "What the Fuck!!!!" towards the end of the trailer. Peace Out and keep in touch.

Update on the Uwe hunt

jsaystoyou — Thu, 17 Apr 2008 01:29:10 +0000

The petition has now reached 203,000 signatures.
Future updates to come.
Now, come on people, can someone start a petition to end the careers of anyone and everyone with the creation of "meet the spartans"? Seriously, Uwe's movies may suck some ass, but they've never made any money, yet another "(something) movie" will come out soon, and will undeniably make enough money to warrant another one, and undeniably suck 100 times harder than anything Uwe ever did.
Just my thoughts...

Holy fuckin crap!

jsaystoyou — Wed, 09 Apr 2008 15:19:01 +0000

Alright, I loved postal as much as the next guy (if that next guy actually saw it, but holy fuckin crap, there is an online petition to stop Uwe Boll from ever making a film again. He's gone on record stating that if over 1 million people sign this petition, he'll give up.
So make your voice heard. Whether you love him (cough cough Ken cough) or hate him, (cough cough everyone Cough COUGH) this could be the end of Dr. Boll's film making career.
The petition is already at nearly 138,000 signatures.
You can "sign" the petition at http://www.petitiononline.com/RRH53888/petition.html

The reason I love the Hulk!!!

angelknight32 — Thu, 13 Mar 2008 23:33:36 +0000

If you haven't heard that there is a new Incredible Hulk film that is coming out this June you may have been living under a rock however, if you would like to bring yourself back into the world of living then check out this link over to MTV where the trailer premiered this week or go see Doomsday this Friday where it will be attached. This thing is going to be amazing. Here is the link :http://www.mtv.com/overdrive/?id=1583143&vid=215625. Please do yourself a favor and check this out.