Dorkgasm Gonzo Is God

            Sports comedies are often at their best when a few formulae are followed. Like geometry, deviation from the formula is dangerous and often disastrous. You need a sport without a popular professional following, like dodgeball or beer drinking. Endanger something the main characters love. Add a crazy guru to train the hero, and then have him compete in a tournament that will earn him the exact amount of money to save the aforementioned threatened something. It sounds easy, but the list of these films is short enough that it must go wrong a lot. When it goes right it is a wonderful event to behold, and Clubless: The Legend of Victor Montango goes right in almost every way.

            Okay so let me rant for just a minute. Being a person of sound mind and body, I generally find it extremely irritating when I watch a movie for two hours that is total crap. When a movie has no standards of acting, screenwriting, production (from costuming to set production), and then totes itself as a major achievement in cinematic history, I flip. When a movie lacks all of these things, it is not worth the money wasted to make it or the time lost watching it. Unfortunately, a number of these craptastic films wind up with the label “alright if you are chillin”.

            The abject terror I felt was visceral. I would have wet myself, if not for the nearly empty lines at the men's room. I knew The Strangers was supposed to be a scary movie, but I didn't expect the only fear I felt to come from the lines of women waiting to see Sex and the City. Braving my lack of estrogen inoculation, I wandered into my theater and hoped, against the odds, for the best.