Dorkgasm Gonzo Is God

            By most American standards, the summer season doesn’t launch until Memorial Day weekend. This is often true for the movie business as well, and 2008 kicks in with Indiana Jones and The Kingdom of the Crystal Skull. Some fans may come away disappointed, but they shouldn’t. Hang on to your fedoras, this review is FULL OF SPOILERS!

            If I had been given a choice of movies that I never expected to see another sequel to, the Indiana Jones trilogy would have topped my list. The three movies, while still incredibly fun, felt to me like they were a product of the times, a distant but pleasing memory. However, with Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull, those heady days of intrigue and adventure came rushing back to me in a flood of nostalgia.

So a couple of days ago, various genre news outlets, writers and filmmakers began receiving strange, mysterious black envelopes. Inside were letters featuring what looked like ancient script. Now, we at Dorkgasm love a good ARG, so our interest was piqued. We ate up the news that this might be tied to a video game, or a new film project. Of course, we sought out content and were directed to http://chishio.jp

There, we found the following:

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Part 3 Coming Soon!

            As you will no doubt notice, I feel like we have been here before.

            I suppose I might have more to complain about the latest installment of Walden Media’s Narnia series, but I really don’t. So they skip a book or two in the chronology, who cares? I haven’t actually read them! I was more of a Tolkien reader as a kid. So the story is really a Jesus allegory, didn’t we already know that? No, the one element of The Chronicles of Narnia: Prince Caspian that bugged me was that it felt like the cast of villains from Elizabeth: The Golden Age had been kidnapped and implanted in New Zealand.