Dorkgasm Gonzo Is God

            I remember, as I’m sure many of you do, the power and glory of The X-Files in its hey-day. Scully was hot, Mulder was cool, and you could cut the sexual tension with an alien anal probe. The stories were all weirder than anything on TV short of Jerry Springer’s talk show, and we couldn’t wait for the next bizarre piece of evidence to slip through their fingers. Now, the only thing slipping is the franchise, and there’s probably a reason it took so long to convince anyone to make The X-Files: I Want to Believe.